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Thursday, October 18, 2012

Stress & Consequences

So....I haven't written or posted in awhile.  I have had some issues that prevented me from being able to maintain this blog.  I recently went through a very stressful time that I thought I could just breeze through, but reality gave me a wake-up call.  The pressures made it difficult to work on my change plan.

I found it easier to just eat what I'm used to when I'm stressed out.  That means...there was a lot of bread, lunch meat, pork chops, chicken, etc.  These are my go-to foods, but bread especially.  It actually makes me feel good when I'm not feeling so well.  My love affair with it has now gotten me in trouble.

I recently went to see a doctor because my stomach, heart burn and acid reflux all went haywire one morning on my way to class.  All I had was 2 ham sandwiches.  I've had them plenty of times before, but this time, my body was upset with me.  My stomach was screaming, I hate you! Why did you do this?!  I did not intentionally try to hurt my tummy.  I was just trying to put something in it before I sat through a class for 3 hours.  It was definitely the wrong choice.

I figured I could make it through the class and be ok.  BOY, was I wrong!  By the end of class, my chest was tight, and I was extremely gassy in my stomach.  I had taken an extra Nexium during class, and I thought I would be ok.  As I was leaving class, I started to become short of breath and I got dizzy.  What is going on?  This can't just be regular heartburn.  One of my friends walked me to the infirmary, and by the time I got there, I could hardly breathe.  Where's my inhaler? I can't believe I left my inhaler!  That's right, I have asthma!  I was so scared!

I began to cry!  Somehow, the release in pressure allowed my breathing to start adjusting back to normal.  The doctor told me what I was experiencing was an anxiety attack.  Looks like you were having a psychosomatic reaction to what's going on inside of your stomach.  Are you trying to tell me I'm crazy?  The doctor laughed and told me NO.  Great! Because I don't think I could handle that too! 

At first, they thought I had a bacterial infection.  Turns out, I was having an allergic reaction to the bread I had eaten.  I had a high concentration of yeast in my body, and my stomach was like Ummmm. NO! Not going to work in here! 

Now I have to adjust my diet!  I have to start the break-up process with the one that keeps me smiling.  Bye bye, best friend!  We can still be acquaintances......I think.

That wasn't all the doctor told me.  I also have a low iron count, which means I have to start eating more red meat and those green, leafy things I can't stand.  Spinach is gross!  But now I have no choice.  As a confirmed adult, YOU have to start acting like one and take responsibility for YOUR eating choices.

Easy for you to say!  You don't have an eating disorder!  I would love to be able to eat everything that everyone else can.  It's not fair that many things that are good for me also tastes horrible!  I love the food I can eat, and I hate that my taste buds don't agree with me when I try new things.

Now I have to literally force myself to try to eat things that I normally wouldn't eat.  Just trying to eat a salad the other day caused me stress.  I was so sad.  I don't want to be depressed about the food in my life.

SO....If anyone out there has some ideas about how I can hide veggies in my meals, I'm open to the ideas.  Please keep in mind, I don't eat cheese and most citrus fruits.

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